Here are 5 Important Principles Promoting Your Childs Mental Health

Read a parent and mental health care professionals advice on how to promote your child's mental health.

Promoting Your Child's Mental Health

Children and adolescent mental health has been declining for over a decade, with depression and anxiety on the rise. Parents play a pivotal role in shaping their children's mental well-being. Raising a child to live a fulfilling and enjoyable life to the best of their ability should be the number one priority for parents.

As a parent and professional in the field of children and adolescent mental health care, I'd like to share some general advice with parents facing frequent tantrums, behavioral difficulties, or distress in their children. None of these points should be overlooked when trying to ensure good mental fortitude for your child.

Before moving on, I'd like to emphasize the necessity to seek professional help if you suspect your child is suffering from mental health problems. Some children or adolescents require therapy or even medications to support their mental health. 

Still, the following suggestions will be beneficial to most children and I explore these domains with almost every troubled parent I meet. Frequently, one or more areas are overlooked by the parents. 

1. Show Frequent Affection

A warm and caring household is the cornerstone of a healthy upbringing. Show your child daily affection and tell them you love them several times a day. Reaffirm your love and care for them.

If you are two parents with several children in the household, try to make time for whole family activities as well as one-on-one time with each child for both parents. This helps every child to feel seen and cared for, as well as fostering all relationships within the family.

If your child is having frequent tantrums or misbehaving, try to spend more time with them. It is suggested that parents play with their children for at least 15 minutes every day. During this time, avoid dominating the game or play, but instead, let your child lead and just follow along.

Something like an extended hug may help calm your child down when they are stressed or upset. For example, you can instill "20-second hugs" in your home where you hug your child and count to twenty. This can help calm both you and your child in a stressful moment.

Affection alone is not a guarantee that a child will not suffer from distress or poor mental health. Most, if not all, of the other points on this list, cannot be compensated for by affection alone.

2. Maintain Consistent Rules

Consistently enforced rules and boundaries are another cornerstone of healthy parenting. This includes avoiding coming up with rules, or making changes to existing rules, in the heat of the moment. Clear and consistent rules are effective in introducing healthy changes into your childs life and often positive changes can be observed already after a couple days - but only if you remain consistent.

Make agreements in advance about what you expect from your child and what the consequences will be if the rules are not followed. The best type of consequences are natural ones, as long as they do not pose a danger to your child. For instance, if your child plays in the rain, they will get wet and cold. They'll also have to spend time changing clothes and thus they might lose out on time doing a more enjoyable activity. 

Avoid acting in anger when your child does something unwanted or displeasing. If you have not previously explained the consequences, the child may not be able to consider them. Even then, children needs frequent reminders of cause-and-effect. Being angry is an irrational response and only teaches your child to poorly regulate their own emotions. Patience is a virtue, especially as a parent.

For example, before going to a restaurant, talk to your child and set reasonable boundaries. Explain in an age-appropriate way that it’s not allowed to bother other guests by being loud or running around. Make it clear that if this boundary is not followed, you will have to leave early. Stay calm but firm with previous agreements, however upset your child becomes. Once the child calms down, you can talk over what happened and reiterate why it was necessary to leave.

Only make boundaries and rules that you are sure you can maintain and that your child can reasonably follow. Be sure to frequently compliment and reward your child for their good behavior. Positive reinforcement is always preferred to negative outcomes.

3. Eat, Sleep, Repeat.

In other words, ensure proper sleep, a healthy diet, and regular routines.

Children are constantly growing and developing, and their bodies and brains must get a sufficient amount of rest. Lack of sleep or irregular sleeping habits can quickly have unwanted effects on the child's well-being and behavior. Set a bedtime for your child to sleep and stick to it. 

The foods you eat affect your mental health and this holds true for your child as well. Introducing small children to a wide variety of foods increases the odds of them not becoming picky eaters. In turn, children will eat a balanced diet, which also reduces the risk of vitamin and mineral deficiencies. 

A regular sleeping and eating schedule not only ensures your child gets enough rest and nutrition but also provides a reassuring structure, making the day more predictable from their point of view. Let your child know in advance if plans are going to deviate from the usual. How much time in advance is needed depends on the individual child.

4. Encourage Exercise and Hobbies

In today's sedentary society, it is important to encourage an active lifestyle in your child from an early age. Physical exercise, best in the form of play, is vital to keep the body and mind healthy.

You may try different sports and hobbies with the child as it gets older. As a parent, do not overly rely on your child’s initial reaction to a suggested sport or hobby before they have engaged in it a few times.

Encouraging a child to try different activities broadens their perspective and increases the odds of them finding something they enjoy, while decreasing the risk of them becoming overly passive.

Some parents may wait for their children to take the initiative and let them know what they want to do, but remember that children are new explorers in this world and they only have vague conceptions about what a sport or hobby may actually entail.

Extracurricular activities are vital not only for physical and mental health, but they also help make children more confident and shape their identities as individuals. It can set them apart from their classmates and become interesting topics for discussion among peers, especially as they grow older. This is often an overlooked benefit of extracurricular activities.

At the same time, boredom is an integral part of life, and filling every waking moment with constant stimuli, especially with screen time, will likely lead to an impatient and restless child. Be sure to follow the recommended guidelines on screen time by age.

Excessive screen use can negatively impact the childs development. Limiting screen time may initially prove difficult as screen use can be addictive. Once again, with consistently enforced boundaries change can be seen already after a couple days.

5. Support Educational Success

While every child is different, school and education are mandatory parts of the modern society that every child must partake in.

Make sure your child gets the support they need throughout their entire educational process. Work in cooperation with the school staff to find out your child's strengths and difficulties and address these properly.

Children suffering from either overly difficult or understimulating education will not feel rewarded during their days at school, and thus their motivation for further studying will likely deteriorate quickly and negatively affect their mental health.

Educational success does not imply your child must become a PhD at Harvard or have the best grades, but rather that they are studying at a level and intensity that is appropriate and encouraging for them to keep wanting to learn more.

Finally, support the child's relationships with their peers and try to enable the healthy relationships to grow outside of the school setting. Any problems with bullying must be addressed swiftly and with a plan agreed upon by the school and all affected parents involved.

Seek Professional Help

If you suspect your child or teenager is suffering from mental health problems, do not hesitate to seek professional help. Mental health professionals can provide the necessary support and treatment tailored to your child's needs. Early intervention can make a significant difference in your child's overall well-being and development. 

Cover image by prostooleh on Freepik

Author: J. Martin, M.D.
Last update: June 17, 2024

Disclaimer: The information provided is intended for general informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always consult with a qualified healthcare provider, such as a physician, before starting any new treatment or making changes to your existing treatment plan. Individual responses to treatment may vary, and a healthcare professional can provide personalized guidance based on your specific needs and circumstances. If you are experiencing severe or persistent symptoms of disease or mental illness, seek immediate medical attention.